One of my lovely readers said to me the other day, “You haven’t been blogging.”  I could have kissed her (and liked it).  I just love it when someone reads my blog.

Well this is what my life looks like these days.  About a month or so ago I broke my ring finger on my right hand.  I got a splint and wore it for two weeks when I got a case of Dyshidrotic eczema (interpretation – blisters from Hell).  I developed little pussie blisters all over the palms of my hands.  I had had this about a month before but they went away in a day or two.  Not this time.  I got them on my knee, between my toes and on my forearms.

I decided to go see my doctor who diagnosed my illness.  While looking at my feet she told me I not only had the blisters there but I also had toenail fungus and athlete’s foot.  Can I get an amen?  I ventured to the pharmacy and got my prescription and a tube of anti-fungal cream and a lovely little bottle with a toenail fungus photo on the box.

When I got home and washed my feet to apply all of the above, I read on the toenail box that “this product is not effective on nails.”  What the …?  Why would you put a photo of toenails with fungus on a package of shit that does not work on toenails.  I’m taking it back and demanding they take it off the shelf.

By the way I don’t have athlete’s foot.  My toes were inflamed with the eczema and after two days of use of the prescription cream for the eczema my feet were fine.

The day after I saw the doctor for the skin condition, I had to remove the splint on my broken finger.  The skin was worn away and I had quite a few blisters on that finger.  A week or so later I got the splint back on.  I am now, as I type, typing with one hand and a couple of fingers.  Another reason I haven’t been blogging.

And all of this time the garden has been exploding.  I have made 14 quarts and five pints of hot dilled beans,  two pints of tomato sauce, five quarts and seven pints of French sliced green beans, four quarts of tomatoes and have dried the dehydrator full of dill, basil and parsley.  And the garden is still full.

I made a pot of cabbage rolls but used kale for the leaves.  It was different but still delicious.  I need some kale recipes.  I bought and planted 4 plants and they have taken up about half the row, shading my jalapeños. I have only gotten a few peppers so far. I have trimmed away the shading leaves so hopefully they will start producing.

All this and I have had to keep up with the laundry, some housekeeping (dear god my house is a mess).  And I have smeared this eczema cream all over the place.  I’m sure the dog will never get eczema.  And my steering wheel is safe too.  Plus all the door knobs in the house.

The worst part of this thing is learning how to wipe my ass left handed! I am completely useless with my left hand.  Except for typing, thank goodness!

I also took three days and made it to my daughter’s baby shower in Tucson.  I was so embarrassed with my pussie hands.  (Note that I didn’t spell it pussy. What is the correct word for extremely pus-filled blisters?)

When I got home from Tucson the dog about ate me alive.  Dodging the blisters!  And the garden was covered in weeds and produce.  Weeding the garden one handed is not a fun Zen therapy.  I did manage to get it under control.  The milkweed is starting to produce seed pods and I should get rid of them soon.

I was in the garage yesterday cleaning the dirt off my potatoes to store them for winter.  I got almost ten pounds of potatoes. I had to pull onions to dry next. I think there are about five pounds of them.  And I got 13 heads of garlic.

So anyhow, I was listening to NPR while I worked in the garage and Ted Talks was on talking about time.  It was so very fascinating.  One guy said something to the fact that past and future are real but the present is just an illusion.  F…ing blew my mind!  Be Here Now is one of my all-time favorite books.  I try to be in the here and now but I keep thinking the now is already gone as I say it. Light bulb moment.

I am in the garage Zenning out cleaning the potatoes and I look down and the floor is so dirty.  I naturally get distracted and end up sweeping the garage floor.  If I could just stay focused on what I am doing I could get so much done.  I guess I write that way also.  The Digression Queen is my title.

I get back to the potatoes and realize that I should really put the stuff on the garage floor on the shelves so I can get that part of the floor swept.  I rummage on the shelves and actually throw away and recycle quite a few items.  I am so proud of myself.  I can be such a hoarder when it comes to saving junk I really don’t need.

I had a clay strawberry pot that I had never used.  I put it out on the curb hoping someone would pick it up.  (It’s still there!)  I also recycled several empty vinegar jugs that I had intended to use.  And I recycled several Chock Full of Nuts coffee cans I thought I might need.

I make toddy coffee and I pretty much always use CFON.  It is so delicious.  You put a pound of dry coffee into this plastic container and cover it with water.  Twenty-four hours later you drip the condensed through a filter and into a decanter.  I freeze the coffee in ice cube trays and when I want a cup of coffee I just add a cube to a cup of boiling water.  Ta da!

And so dear reader, I have had a month of Hades.  I decided to take a morning off today and do a couple of things I had been putting off.  Next, I have to vacuum up dog hair.  Emily is doing well, but god, she sheds like a freeking banshee.  (Do banshees really shred?  And what is a banshee?)  Take time out, look on Google.  (An Irish legend; a female spirit whose wailing warns of in impending death in the house.)  Holy guacamole!  I guess she sheds like a retriever.

Peace be with you. And blisters be gone from me.